*snort*

Failure, failure, failure.

I haven't written a SINGLE bloody word. Oh Well. I guess it wasn't meant to be......

11/20/04

This was a shitload of fun.............

 

---

 

01. Bought everyone in the pub a drink
02. Swam with dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said 'I love you' and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Done a striptease
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Stayed up all night long, and watch the sun rise
15. Seen the Northern Lights
16. Gone to a huge sports game
17. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
18. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
19. Touched an iceberg
20.Slept under the stars
21.Changed a baby's diaper
22. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
23. Watched a meteor shower
24. Gotten drunk on champagne
25. Given more than you can afford to charity
26.Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
27.Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
28.Had a food fight
29.Bet on a winning horse
30.Taken a sick day when you're not ill
31.Asked out a stranger
32.Had a snowball fight
33. Photocopied your bottom on the office photocopier
34.Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
35. Held a lamb
36. Enacted a favourite fantasy
37.Taken a midnight skinny dip
38. Taken an ice cold bath
39. Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar
40. Seen a total eclipse
41.Ridden a roller coaster
42. Hit a home run
43. Fit three weeks miraculously into three days
44.Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
45. Adopted an accent for an entire day
46. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
47.Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
48. Had two hard drives for your computer
49. Visited all 50 states.
50. Loved your job for all accounts
51. Taken care of someone who was shit faced
52. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
53.Had amazing friends
54. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
55. Watched wild whales
56. Stolen a sign
57. Backpacked in Europe
58.Taken a road-trip
59. Rock climbing
60. Lied to foreign government's official in that country to avoid notice
61. Midnight walk on the beach
62. Sky diving
63. Visited Ireland
64.Been heartbroken longer then you were actually in love
65. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them
66. Visited Japan
67. Bench pressed your own weight
68. Milked a cow
69.Alphabetized your records
70.Pretended to be a superhero
71.Sung karaoke
72.Lounged around in bed all day
73. Posed nude in front of strangers
74.Scuba diving
75. Got it on to "Let's Get It On" by Marvin Gaye
76. Kissed in the rain
77.Played in the mud
78.Played in the rain
79.Gone to a drive-in theatre
80.Done something you should regret, but don't regret it
81. Visited the Great Wall of China
82.Discovered that someone who's not supposed to have known about your blog has discovered your blog
83. Dropped Windows in favour of something better
84. Started a business
85. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
86. Toured ancient sites
87.Taken a martial arts class
88. Sword fought for the honour of a woman.
89. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
90. Gotten married
91.Been in a movie
92. Crashed a party
93.Loved someone you shouldn't have
94. Kissed someone so passionately it made them dizzy
95. Gotten divorced
96. Had sex at the office
97.Gone without food for 5 days
98.Made cookies from scratch
99.Won first prize in a costume contest
100.Ridden a gondola in Venice
101.Gotten a tattoo
102. Found that the texture of some materials can turn you on
103. Rafted the Snake River
104. Been on television news programs as an "expert"
105. Got flowers for no reason
106. Masturbated in a public place
107.Got so drunk you don't remember anything
108. Been addicted to some form of illegal drug
109.Performed on stage
110.Been to Las Vegas..
111. Recorded music
112. Eaten shark
113. Had a one-night-stand
114. Gone to Thailand
115. Seen Moulin Rouge
116. Bought a house
117. Been in a combat zone
118. Buried one/both of your parents
119. Shaved or waxed your pubic hair off
120. Been on a cruise ship
121. Spoken more than one language fluently
122.Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone
123. Bounced a check
124. Performed in Rocky Horror
125. Read - and understood - your credit report
126. Raised children
127. Recently bought and played with a favourite childhood toy [Candyland]
128. Followed your favourite band/singer on tour
129. Created and named your own constellation of stars
130. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
131.Found out something significant that your ancestors did
132. Called or written your Congress person
133. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
134. ...more than once?
135. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
136.Sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking
137. Had an abortion, or your female partner did
138. Had plastic surgery
139. Survived an accident that you shouldn't have survived.
140. Wrote articles for a large publication
141. Lost over 100 pounds
142. Held someone while they were having a flashback
142.Had a flashback
143. Piloted an airplane
144.Petted a stingray
145.Broken someone's heart
146. Helped an animal give birth
147. Been fired or laid off from a job
148. Won money on a T.V. game show
149.Broken a bone...
150. Killed a human being
151. Gone on an African photo safari
152. Ridden a motorcycle
153. Driven any land vehicle at a speed of 100mph or faster?
154. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
155.Fired a rifle, shotgun or pistol
156. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
157. Ridden a horse
158. Had major surgery..
159. Had sex on a moving train
160. Had a snake as a pet
161. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
162. Slept through an entire flight: takeoff, flight, and landing
163. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
164. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
165. Visited all 7 continents
166. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
167. Eaten kangaroo meat
168. Fallen in love at an ancient Mayan burial ground
169. Been a sperm or egg donor
170. Eaten sushi
171. Had your picture in the newspaper
172. Had 2 (or more) healthy romantic relationships for over a year in your lifetime
173.Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about
174. Gotten someone fired for their actions
175. Gone back to school.
176. Parasailed
177. Changed your name
178. Petted a cockroach
179. Eaten fried green tomatoes
180. Read The Iliad
181. Selected one "important" author whom you missed in school, and read him/ her
182. Dined in a restaurant and stolen silverware, plates, cups because your apartment needed them
183. ...and gotten 86'ed from the restaurant because you did it so many times, they figured out it was you
184. Taught yourself an art from scratch
185. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
186.Apologized to someone years after inflicting the hurt
187. Skipped all your school reunions
188. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
189. Been elected to public office
190. Written your own computer language
191.Thought to yourself that you're living your dream
192.Had to put someone you love into hospice care
193. Built your own PC from parts
194. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you.
195. Had a booth at a street fair
196. Dyed your hair
197: Been a DJ
198: Found out someone was going to dump you via LiveJournal
199:Written your own role playing game
200: Lost your Best Friend for reasons of death

litter issues

Okay... I love my cats, Ido.

I also LOVE having hard wood floors - they are simply the best thing since sliced bread.

However! Thecombination of those two things (cats, ie - litter & wood floors) has created an icky situation -litter is ALL though our house. We walk around and - ick. Little grainy pieces of I don't want to imagine WHAT collect to the bottom of our feet, and just about eveything else - and it's just right icky.

Considering that this MUST be a problemfor more than just me, I went online to look and see what was out there - and bleh. Mats (which I tried in a house with carpet - the brats WOULDN'T walk on them) to complicated screen/carpet combos  (I'm cheap) - but nothing that looks like it would really work.

So....I'm on the hunt/search  for something that will eliminate this problem.  For now, I'm going to try three things - one is to move where their litter boxis so that they have to walk through more of the laundry room (ohhh.... and it REALLY is one!) in order to get into the rest of the house, I'm going to put a bathmat (one of the suggestions I found online) under and in front of the new boxplace -AND I'm going to (try to) sweep at least everyday, instead of just on the weekends when I usually do the full houseclean.

*sigh* I don't know what else todo - I wonder if they would walk on one of those sticky mats like they use in front of the labs to pull residue off of people's shoes?? *snorts* Most likely not. Brats.

So - what have you other cat owners done tocut down on finding litter in places....well - that you REALLLY don't want to?

Shhttuff.

And after all that whinging I did yesterday, what time did I end up going to bed? A little after midnight of course - but by that time, I was actually awake soo....whatever.

I GOT my harddrive! And....*sniff* my computer is ALIVE again. Now, I just need to find someone who can collect whatever is left off of the old hard drive - and I suspect that the battery might be the culprit, because when I have it in, the computer won't even turn on....so YAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also - workertype people are coming to our house today to vent the dryer (though the moisture it was adding to the air really was lovely),  so that I can start it running and leave the house and not worry about burning it down.  We still haven't installed the waterbed (no hose) but... that's coming along nicely.  Our next goal is bookcases, and getting rid of our furniture - it's WAYYYY too big for this place, and makes it feel all cramped and icky. Hopefully, wewill be able to find something for a good deal. Hmm.... I need to scour freecycle again.

*twenty minutes later* Boy! Okay....that was interesting, trying to reorganize all of my yahoo groups. I realized that I have WAYYYYYYYYYYYY too many email addresses, some of which I haven't checked in EONs. 300 unread messages?? *lesigh!!*

Okay -work todo, inone way or another. ta ta!

 

 Ah!!! Readers who have cats - how the HELL do you prevent them from tracking the litter alllllll through the damn house????!!!!

untitled

tired. tired. tired. tired. tired.

Up to my eyeballs in excel.

tired.

wan go sleep NOW.

Cannot.

must work.

bastards!

Catching Up....

Well.... it's been an interesting two weeks - and while there's been plenty of stuff that I've MEANT to write - between life itself, and work, hah - haven't had time. So...let's get started.

1. Sex - whohoo! Not totally perfect, but damn it's a hell of a lot better. Came to a realization over the last few weeks about my - disinterest - I suppose you could say. I'm bisexual, and I've KNOWN this for about 6 years or so. I was always one of those bi folx who believed that if you were with someone, you were with that person - and despite your sexuality - that person alone should be enough. My relationships before C only lasted for about 9 months on average though, which means I never really field-tested that theory. So - in order to remain true to C, I tried to repress my sexuality - acting as if there were two sides of me - the 'straight' side and the 'lesbian' side - and that I could repress one (the lesbian side, obviously) and focus on the other. Instead, what I ended up doing was repressing my sexuality all together - it's an all or nothing game, apparently. So - I think that our little 'conversation' a month ago gave me the 'freedom' to be able to tap back into my full sexuality - and while I still don't crave sex - the thought of a lil freaky deakiness doesn't make me cringe, either. I haven't 'actively' reinstated my bisexuality, but heh - I'm looking forward to it, and knowing that C is cool with it (mildly thrilled, freak that he is) makes it - better in some pretty cool ways. I AM still (kinda sorta) planning on talking to a professional - but with this awareness - hmmm - it'll be interesting to find someone openminded enough in this state - ESP. someone who is recommended by my conservatively republican company.


2. Work - boooo!!! I don't think I've ever worked so freaking hard -ever- but DAMN! was it fun. The last two weeks have been hell on wheels preparing to upgrade and cutover our production system. We got through it the past weekend, finished EIGHT hours ahead of schedule (cuz we fuckin rock) and so far, it sounds good as we haven't heard any screams from the sites. I'm SOO geeked. I've still got a shitload of stuff to do that I put off to get this crap going, but hey - priorities, right? But - perk! I got my 100.00 'Thank you for bending over and being our bitch' gift check on Saturday - but I haven't decided how to spend it just yet. It's between lingere, a sewing machine, or sheets - all things I want, all things I 'kinda' need, and all things that 100.00 bucks would almost cover. Ah! Also found out that I might be able to move to AUSTRALIA as there is a site there that needs support. Italy or Australia?? One thing I LOVE about Australia - they speak ENGLISH! No need to learn a second language (though I need too, but Italian wouldn't be my first choice) So - who knows where I might end up.


3. Home -whhhoooofreakinghooo!!!! First and FOREMOST - Saturday - WE GOT A WASHER AND DRYER. I installed it last night (there was a funny 'gender shift' going on then - I'm in the laundry room, cussing over hooking up the washer & dryer - while C is in the kitchen, washing dishes and cooking dinner -I love us) I was almost in tears loading the first load. I think that this may be the first time I've had my OWN washer and dryer in - years. I certainly haven't had one IN the apartment that I lived in since highschool (make that 1992 - so TWELVE years) - and I honestly can't EVER remember having a washer and dryer IN my house - I've always had to go to coin laundromats. I'm so damn excited I SERIOUSLY don't know what to do with myself. I washed two loads yesterday, and have a SHIT load of stuff to wash that I've had laying around (like blankets) for MONTHS. *sigh* I love it, love it, love it. We ALSO got a queen sized waterbed on Saturday, and worked together to put that together yesterday. We haven't put the mattress in yet (that bitch is HEAVY) but it's taking up most of our bedroom now. Okay - but the COOLEST part of all? We only paid 290 for all three items - 30 bucks (well, 40, as I ain't feel like asking for change once I saw how good shape the bed was in) for the bed, and 250 for the washer and dryer (damn near brand new - not a scratch on them, and the guy had just brought them last year - Kenmore!) I love my work classifieds, and I love my company for making people move and forcing them to sell such lovely items for so outrageously low prices. In other home related news - my NEW hard drive for MY computer should be waiting on my doorstep when I get home today (please treat me right UPS) and I might have a WORKING computer back. Hmm.... maybe I should spend that hundred bucks trying to rescue the data offa my OLD harddrive.


4. Me - whhoooboooo! Okay - the whoo is just because - dammit - I'm happy. I'm content, I'm still broke, but at least I don't FEEL quite so broke, I love my husband again (cycles Kimmie?) and - well....things are going well. The booo is because - I'm GAINING weight again. And yes, it's most likely all the sugar and coffee and starch and just generally bad shit I've been eating lately. I KNOW I'm going back on 'realfood' on Jan 1 (no matter what country I'm in) and I'm considering scooping up one of those hypnotic CD's like 'Rella's got and vibing to that until the end of the year - priming the pump so to speak.

---

I have utterly no comment to make about the election except for that fact that I was sick to my stomach all day on the 2nd, and just plain freaking depressed on the 3rd. The concept of allowing love to shine in ALL it's forms was considered immoral - but a bloody war started for no reason killing who knows how many civilians IS moral......dammit America, how STUPID and NARROWMINDED can you get? *sigh* Shit. So yeah. It's kinda frustrating though - we know that we are stuck with him for the next four years - so at this point, I guess all that we can do is try to mitigate the damage he can cause. *sigh* Shit.

Umm.... I think that's about it for now.

Wow!

That was fast - it's 8pm the day before Nano - and I JUST realized it.

I haven't thought much more about my book - I've given the main character a last name, but other than that - that's it.

And oddly enough - I'm not going to think about it. I'm just going to - run with it. How utterly unlike me, and I think I'll give it up in about three weeks and 25K words but I think I'll have a shitload of fun doing it.

I'm going to aim for 2K words a day - I'm sure there will be points where I won't be able to work on it - or where I just give up, but - I'll try my damnedest.

The List - 4 years later

Reposting this - I originally made the list in December of 2000. It's close enough to four years later - and I'm just going to bold all of the ones that I"ve done.

1. Go to Egypt and stare at the stars
2. Sleep under water
3. Cruise all seven seas
4. Visit Africa
5. Bring my family back together
6. Find my passion
7. Write a novel that more than just my friends think is good
8. Have an exhibit of my art in a museum before I die
9. Work for National Geographic as a photographer
10. Go on an archaeological dig for the Mayans or the Egyptians
11. Go into outer space
12. Watch a meteor shower
13. See a comet
14. Give birth…more than once
15. Make new friends
16. Get married
17. Buy the perfect house
18. Learn how to drive
19. Learn how to speak
20. Write like I think
21. Exercise
22. Lose 100 pounds (75..... I'm getting closer!)
23. Love myself
24. Fall in love
25. Never worry about money again
26. Learn how to be empathic
27. Learn how to be symphatic
28. Become a martial arts master
29. Become a ballerina
30. Get a tattoo
31. Learn Japanese
32. Forgive
33. Forget
34. Go through boot camp
35. Make my first million
36. See perfectly
37. Buy a new car
38. Bake a perfect loaf of bread
39. Fly the way I do in dreams
40. Make magic
41. Get a cat
42. Go to New York City
43. Learn how to draw
44. Go EVERYWHERE!
45. Talk to Maya Angelou and Octavia Butler and Alice Walker and Nikki Giovanni and Nsotake Shange
46. See For colored girls who have considered suicide when the rainbow was enuf
47. Figure out my family tree
48. Become a super hero
49. Let go
50. Hold on
51. Create bigger dreams
52. Ride amtrak across america
53. Have a real honeymoon
54. Treat myself better
55. Speak UP!
56. Let my emotions go
57. Forgive myself
58. Become a better photographer
59. Become a worse doormat (working on it!!)
60. Go white water rafting
61. Lock my hair
62. Go blond (okay - you can't really tell, but it ain't for lack of trying)
63. Get shorter
64. Get taller
65. Play sports
66. Learn how to swim
67. Play a video game
68. Mingle
69. Grow old gracefully
70. Sa y what I mean and what I feel when I mean and feel it
71. Write more letters
72. Write more cards
73. Write more
74. Develop a personality
75. Finish what I start
76. Go out in the country and go camping under the stars
77. Buy a good telescope
78. Feel gorgeous
79. Splurge on myself
80. Go for what I don't know
81. Step out on Faith
82. Gain faith
83. Believe
84. Take singing lessons
85. See Meshell Ndgeachello and Janet Jackson and Jamaroqui and D'Angelo and Rachelle Ferrell and Macy Gray and Nina Simone and Boyz II Men and Jill Scott in concert
86. Complete my music collection
87. Start my music collection
88. Become a collector of things
89. Become less sexist
90. Relate to that which is different
91. Create traditions
92. Grow Up
93. Stay in touch with my inner child
94. Own my own bookstore
95. Create something totally new
96. Be healthy
97. Be strong
98. Be real
99. Get back all the friends I ever lost
100. Stay true to myself…

---

Boy - I've got a lot of work to do!

---

rushed....

So. I'm happy - and guiltily excited. He's happy - and just relieved that he'll have a chance to get some on a regular basis. It's - weird - how big of a stink this whole thing was casuing over our WHOLE relationship - and now - it feels almost right again. I'm still going to call the counselor (maybe today in fact) but - at least I don't feel like dying/crying/or getting a divorce. Hah. I can't never do stuff normally......

In other news - my husband is NOT a registered voter. Can I tell you how hard I'm going to pop him upside the head next time I see him? I'm registered - under my maiden name (I knew there was a reason I never changed the name on my passport). I knew I was, but couldn't remember where I lived when I registered....so - he'll have to drive me to the polls on the 2nd. The big bum.

I'm going home early, as it's Friday, I've got stuff to do but I'm so restless at work that I can't do it - and besides both of my bosses are out today. Kiss my ass.

I hate Indy. I don't think I've mentioned that lately, but this city sucks. I was looking for a halfway good alternative bookstore - and nothing. Nada. Shit on a stick. My best bet is to go to the biggest Borders and hope that living in the bible belt hasn't resulted in TOO much censorship (hah) or just suck it up, go to Amazon, and wait a week.

Hyper am I. Bloated am I as well. I blame it on the three (yes, I'm a greedy sugar loving woman) Long's doughnuts I had this morning. Long's is a local brand - and they are better than Krsipy Kreme. They kinda taste the same, but they are much better in one very important way - they still taste WONDERFUL cold. KK's - if you let them sit for too long - they get all - ucky. but Longs???? yuuummmm..... so yes - my digestive system is currently calling me everything BUT a child of god.

Hmm... cab's taking a while. *sigh* I wan go HOME!

deja vu

"so how does it feel to be in the couple and not the incoming freak?"

Very, very, very odd.

We talked. We cried.... a lot actually. We realized that yeah, we do have options - I don't HAVE to change, and neither does he. I realized that yeah, he does love me - and he confirmed that he always knows that I love him.

Good lord help me, I'm stepping BACK into the lifestyle. I was smoking something yes, but this is CRAZY.

*laugh* And so much fun. Good lord.