Thursday, March 23, 2000

Choices

sometimes
the wise choice to make
is the one that hurts the most
sometimes
the decision based in
this world
and not the world of our hearts
is the most painful one to face
sometimes
the ones you thought
you could depend on
let you down
sometimes
tears
are the only thing
that you can feel.



This is dedicated to all of those who have ever had to make the hard choice. The choice that haunts, the choice that humbles, the choice that can change you in terrifying ways. This is dedicated to all those who have to make those choices daily, hourly, with every breath they take. This is dedicated to any one who makes the choice that tears them apart...for logic, for love, for wisdom. This is for those who have ever exercised their right to chose, no matter what the choice.



They say whatever does not kill you will make you stronger.
How strong do you get before you die?

Tuesday, March 7, 2000

The Leash of a Good Mother

Professional women are called bad mothers for leaving the home, and their children to work. Women who are on welfare are considered to be bad mothers because they don't leave their home or children to work.
Ironic ain't it?

Brain bursts

sometimes what needs to be said
gets too caught up in the words
to ever be heard

sometimes what needs to be heard
gets too caught up in
what is expected to be said

sometimes the words that
are supposed to express everything
really say nothing at all

and sometimes they say everything.

I have been reading the OD for the past week or so…and each time I read I think.. ‘Damn… I need to write something’ I have a looonngg entry written in my paper journal that I may put in here…all about race & gender and what that REALLLY means to me…. and then I have two more that are in my head but don’t really seem ready to be born. I think that they may be another case of me touching on some issues in me that I am not sure I even really want to think about much less touch. I don’t like rambling… and when I start to dig inside of me to explore I realize that that tends to be all that I do…. ramble on and on in circles about something that I have no firm grasp on. So instead I have to chew on them in my brain for a while before I dare let them out to pollute some paper. Random Future Entries: What does being gay mean to me? Why don’t I have many friends? The Beauty Myth: How do I reflect it? Why do I hate women sometimes? How bad of a bug is Jealousy…and does it have a cause? I think that is about it. At least for right now.

*sighs * I really dislike moodswings… I wish it would just come on and be done with. grr.

Stay Jazzed.