Wander Lust

I’ve lived in over 15 places in 24 years, and while that might not seem like much, it has made me who I am. In fact, if anyone asked me what shaped the person that I am the most the four things that would be on that list are: 1) Reading 2) Moving 3) Home Schooling 4) Islam . That it. Four things without with I wouldn’t be ME… I most likely wouldn’t be where I am now, and I sure as hell wouldn’t be who I am now.
For right now, I want to try and make a record of everywhere that I have lived. I have been having odd little flashbacks of places in the last few days, and I want to remember just how it was.
1. Washington, DC – birth to 4 years
The lovely place in southwest with the hardwood floors
I had Sesame St on the walls and woke up one night afraid of Bert.
Had my first sexual exploration with a girl…my first overall
The lovely tree in the back that they chopped down
Very close to the MD border
Saw the rainbow arching over the bus stop
went to preschool and wore the too large Sylvester costume

2. Springfield MA – about 9 months
3. Boston, MA – about 2 years
4. Chester, PA – about 2 years
5. Cleveland, OH – about 1 year
6. Somewhere in OH – about 2 months
7. Xenia, OH – about 3 years
8. Boston, MA – about 2 years
9. Trenton, NJ – about 9 months
10.Chester, PA – about 4 years
11.Atlanta, GA – about 5 years
11a. Kennedy, Florida – 2 summers
12. Indianapolis, IN – about 1 year

That’s it. I think that I am forgetting some places mainly because the years between 5 and about 12 are more or less a blur. I remember small things, but nothing concrete. I have always wondered why…maybe because so little in my life was concrete?

This is how I really feel....

Cookies make my tummy hurt. They also make me something else, but I’m going to keep that tidbit of information to myself.

I got another indicator today of just how odd I am… relatively speaking. Or maybe not. I have never been one who just knew that she was going to be getting married at some point. I was more of the mentality that I would get someone to knock me up, and me and my many babies would live in happy solitude. Okay… actually I wanted to live in a commune with me and a few wonderful people who would be good friends and occasional lovers. That was about it.

Now I’m faced with the concept that – Oh my GOD – I have met someone that I would very much so like to marry, and I have no clue how to do it. Okay, I have a rough idea of what married life would be like from here – real life in all it’s glory and misery – and a general idea of what I would want my married life to be like. I want it to be rather like my relationship life, only longer…and sweeter and stronger and more steady. I have a general idea of how I want to have and raise my kids. I have a good idea what I want my ring(s) to look like.

The problem is, you see, unlike a grand majority of women, I have utterly no CLUE what I want to wedding to be like. I have joked about getting married in all black (which I look damn good in I might add) or eloping… but other than that *shrugs* No clue. Isn’t that wonderful? And cool and amazing all at once? I get to maybe do something that I haven’t planned for. *grins* How interesting. Just for an idea of a cool wedding… there is a commercial where this guy and girl are standing on the beach in Hawaii and they are being married by a very much so Hawaiian guy. Then they dubbed the video, tossed in some music, and sent it to their parents. Now THAT… is a wedding. The white dress, catering, cake, reception halls, bridesmaids, grooms *starts groaning* Nope… nope…nope. Too much damn money. And stress. And expectations.

Anyhowwwwwwwwww…. I think I’m jumping the gun anyway. We have agreed that at some point we want to marry each other, but I’m not engaged. Nope… not at all. *LOL* I shan’t be engaged until one of us gives the other a proposal. *grins* Maybe I should propose to him… and get him a ring… *LOL* I don’t know. I’m happy and excited and I think that I am getting this way waaaaaayyy too far in advance and it might be years and he might change his mind (cuz I’m NOT changing mine) and maybe maybe maybe *deep breath*

I don’t know what might be. I just know what I am hoping for. And what I’m looking forward too is a long, mostly joyful, wonderful life with my Corey. The maybe wedding is just a blip on the road. Oh my .

Stay Jazzed.