Friday, December 3, 1999

12/3/99

*sighs* I think that I must have picked the utterly WORST period of my life to choose to write daily in...
I am so busy that now I consider writing in that day to mean if I write on the date itself... or the date of the day I woke up in... :) I will be okay...*sighs*
I am scared...scared scared scared. I don't want to write the words down for fear they may be true.. but I am terrified.. pertrifed and utterly afraid of what my be coming in my life. If I was a praying woman I would pray...and even though I am not.. I still am. *sighs* Okay...back to the story....



Where was I?? Oh yes... the inner child/slut/parent. *sighs* I don't really want to talk about that... I don't really want to talk about anything. At least nothing serious...nothing major. I want to talk about something as light and unimportant as a old feather in the rain. BUt everything in my life seems to be weighing me down like...like mud. Think and sucking and... *sighs* I fight with everything taht is in me to stay strong and to pull myself up out of the pit. *sighs* graduation is too too far away...somedays it seems like the only bright spot in my life is Tashi. We are so dainty with each other... trying to feel out each and every thing we want to do before we do it to insure no...upset in the relationship. *sighs* And there I went.. back into something heavy...*blows a kiss up the Mountain* Sleep well my sweet....

Stay Jazzed.

No comments: