J said - Opening

*sighs*

Can I say that sometimes life SUCKS? you are going along so smoothly and suddenly *SLAP* life tells you.. nope wrong way..turn the hell around and start over. I think that is what has happened to me... but.. I kinda like it.


Okay... The history... I'm in college...or at least I was..studying to be a Computer Engr. Then.. my body & my mind ganged up on me and decided that they were tired of being told what everyone else wanted us to do. And so..I'm doing my thing. I dropped out (just for a while) I'm trying to get a job.. and I am moving in with a roommate. So far so good...my mother had less of a heart attack than I hoped...my grandmother won't know.


So what is the problem? I'm scared.... scared as I don't know what that I so totally did the wrong thing. That maybe I should have suffered a little more and went through the rest of school. Maybe I Will like this too much and will never want to go back..until it's too late. Maybe i will get in too much debt...maybe no one will hire me. For the first time I have NO clue what will happen next. I don't have a curriculum to follow, and can I tell you it is scary.


Hmmm....then the whole other relationship thing. I was trying to experiment with my sexuality... *laughs* but it is so hard to find open minded bi black women and men it's funny... I KNOW that I'm not the only crooked branch out there.


*sighs*


I guess that is it...for now.....