Tears of Joy in Egypt

There are toxins in tears
the ones we release with our fears
and our hated unharmonious thoughts
there are toxins in tears
that we’ve shed over the years
and almost totally forgot
there are toxins in tears
poison for those dear
who have turned away
there are toxins in tears
best to shed than to hold near
and go on and cry another day

Weekend highlights (if it’s a low point is it still a highlight?)
okay.. this weekend…hmm. Shall I go with the interpersonal or the superficial?? I think inter… but then again I AM a sucker for punishment. Talked to JJ about MJW. *sighs* they both want to come down for Black Pride on Labor Day weekend...but JJ says that he will be very uncomfy if MJW comes down. *sighs* I don’t know what to do. Actually he said that he might act stank….*sighs* and I so don’t need any drama in my life. But.. I can’t see myself saying.. no MJW don’t come. *rolls eyes* yeah right...as if THAT would ever happen. I don’t know…I will figure SOMETHING out…
CAK is having… *sighs* problems. I don’t know.. I worry about him so much sometimes.. and I have to remind myself that I am not his saviour. I can’t be... I don’t have the strength or the understanding to do so. I can only…suggest ways for him to follow...point out things that may either aid or dissuade his healing. And if he chooses to do otherwise…*shakes head* I have to resist my stubborn pride and support him there too. *grrrrrr* I swear…this is as much of a learning/growing process for me as it is for him.
hmm… what else happened this weekend? Nothing really of earth shaking importance…*laughs* I got a buzz off of some Bailey’s Irish Cream Ice cream (the cone REALLY wasn’t tha big…) I saw The Wood and American Pie…. (both Excellent movies…and ladies and my gay/bi brothers ...the Water Hose scene in The Wood was JUST for us!!!) I read a lot of books about Egyptian Mythology….*sighs & smiles*

It is odd…how… *frowns* blind I can be sometimes. I have been interested in Wicca for a wile now.. tying to decide how I wanted to approach it. The belief system itself interests me (very very independent & femme focused), I have always had a love for ritual and spells…ad I try to make visualization & meditation a way of life. But somehow…I could never get past the Celtic/Old Britian roots of it. I simply couldn’t turn my back on my heritage like that. So then.. I checked into the Yoruba/Voudun/Santeria faiths… and still none of them really.. I don’t know…they didn’t spark that HEY this is what I have been looking for thing…they ranged too far from the things that had attracted me to Wicca in the first place. And then… I was reading Drawing Down the Moon again.. and something in there caught my eye and mind… a comment about those who worshipped the Egyptian god/esses. And I was off! *laughs* I am disgustingly logical about almost everything tat I do.. and while I want to find out more about Tameran (basically Egyptian Wicca.. yeah yeah I know….) I want to work within a mind set that I have...examined and worked on. *smiles* So I read...and I think.. and I write… and I dream…and…*smiles* rediscovering the cat Goddess Bast… I don’t know… It is odd and amazing and empowering and scary all at once.. cuz I have no CLUE what I’m doing...but it all feels SO right…that I’m actually trusting my heart and just working from there…
Goddess… I don’t belive that it is only 2 something.. I was up kinda late with CAK and I am sooooo sleepy. *sighs* Ad next weekend is the Jamaroqui concert. *WHOO HOOO* I’m gonna be tripping and dippin and flippin right on out….The first one I went t was the BOMB. Simply wonderful…*sighs* and the weekend after that I am getting my braids put back in…by hook or by crook…ffffrrrreeeeedddoooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Ummhmmmm. I have been feeling so darn good…after that super super low point I hit.. it is like I feel light and airy and…giggly and shit again. But it hink that just might be the sleepiness talking.. that or the vitamins.
I have issues swallowing pills….major ones. It took me close to a month to get used to taking birth control pills and those suckers are TINY. So of course.. vitamins and the like were out out out…well yesterday.. me & nee were wandering around Lil Five…and went into a health food store…and lo and behold…not only did they have LIQUID multivitamins….the had CHEWABLE iron pills…the price was not even an object. :) I’mma be healthier dammit. Somehow or another…okay.. I’m so sleepy my nose is throbbing…and I’m babbling. Must stop doing that…and instead try to

Stay Jazzed.