So - might as well take advantage of this private room to write the shit that makes me blush to even consider.
Like how I'm so fucking tired of this emotional pregnant or not rollercoaster - and fuck, I've got an IUD in now - how much WORSE isit going to be when we are really trying?
And like how I feel so guilty/pissed over the fact that I'll have to go totally clean - no smoking (anything!) no drinking, and it just reinforces for me the fact that I'm still SO damn selfish.
But at the same time, I'm thinking in my heart that for my child, I'll give it up in an instant - without the blinkof an eye.
Okay - with the emotional out of the way - still having this odd 'smeary' shit. It looks like a combo of my regular secretions thickened and colored with a VERY light amount of blood - not enough to keep it's color during the long trip, as it comes out VERY thick and dark brown. Almost NO smell - besides the smell of fresh pussy.
My boobs aren't sore - but I no have a lil leakage in the right boob, and those odd - twinges in the left.
*sigh* maybe it's just a 'hiccup' like before, and I'll need a restart with a hormone or two.
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