FF gave me a coverline today - saying I O'd like 3 or 4 days ago.
WTF?
Just when I had gotten comfy in my anovulatory state, BAM! Ovulation. It lies, I'm almost certain.
But dammit, now I'm not going to take the ginger. Shit. It's a waiting process, it is. Unless his boys & girls are REALLLLLY sturdy, aint' nothing get caught.
Sheesh.
I just want to BLEED, dammit, kay, thanks?
In other news, I've been thinking about the gut-deep terror that I've been feeling about finally becoming a mother. I think - I think it's the pure fear of the unknown that's getting to me. I can't practice this, I can't run through scenarios - it's just a huge pit of possibilities, and I'm about to jump in without looking feet-first, and good lord & lady, but that shit is SCARY. TYVM!
But. I can learn - I might not know EXACTLY how things will do, but I can learn how things might go. I can develop the tools that will be flexible enough for me to meet things as they come along.
And I've done the budget - and we need to pay off my car for things to be really smooth. *sigh*
We shall see.
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