12:23

Still bleeding. *shrugs* Whatever.

I'm. I'm in a mood, really. And, I know - in my heart of hearts that coming down off of the shrooms caused the mood - but, no. It allowed me to fully experience the change.

I'm broken. Really, I am. And the only way to fix that is to acknowledge. I've got a wall 12 feet thick and 20 feet high all around me, and I don't know how to break it down. Most of the time, I don't even realize it's THERE - and last night, I literally FELT it come back up, and I was so disappointed.

Even now, thinking of it beings tears to my eyes because - it's not fair. It's - it's cruel, actually.

And I don't know how to fix it. I can barely look directly at it. But I know that I want it gone.

12:26