J said - Daydreamin...

This will be me one day...super woman. Perfetly shaped. Perfectly done...with out even seeing her you KNOW her face is lovely and her hair and her nails are exquisite.

*sighs* Sometimes I feel squashed...my favorite daydream is how folx I haven't seen for a while would react if I turned up looking perfect. Long legs.. firm ass...perfectly melon like breasts...tight as a drum stomach...or even a gently rounded one...with a great job and a loving partner. Oh my how I would rub it in the faces of some folx. But it is SUCH a pipe dream...I'se too po' and too lazy to do what I need to do to get to my state of perfection...or at least what I think that I need to do.


I thank the gods that my mother was a nurse sometimes...and the she told me what certain things DO to your body... otherwise I would have been bulimic looong time ago. But I LOVE my body too much to do something so dangerous to it just so that I will LIKE it more...


I watch people...and I envy those who say so casually...

'hey.. I'm going to the gym....hey.. my trainer is on his way over...hey I have to go workout tonight...' I would love to...damn..I need a car...


I wonder if I'm the only one who wishes that she could carve herself into someTHING new...like NOW. and yes.. I might be influenced by the THIN is beautiful fad that is sweeping though America...but I don't want to be scrawny...I just want to be a 8..maybe even 10. helll... even a 12 would do.....


J.