J said - Fractured Personalities

I want so much sometimes...and so little at other times.. that I have finally accepted the fact that I have multiple personalites. Almost any of my friends would tell me that...and i would brush them off, saying that I was just moody... but I realize.. I truly do have a couple of different people hiding out in me.
1) The Rich Woman

She thinks only of what can be brought and sold..and the fastest ways to get more money. No morals...very few values. I ignore most of her suggestions...but she can be very persistant...

2) Lady Wisdom

She is the ancient one...the one who in the back of my mind is constantly screaming J! what the hell are you doing.. do you know what this could do to your life...you know we need that money/time/attention focused on something else.. basically a mother figure/consience...highly paranoid tho.. so I often have to tell her to shut up.

3) Wild Woman

She gets me in the most trouble...not just wild, but happy go lucky too. She is the one who takes me on my highs...and sulks quite miserably when everything doesn't work out. Clearly her and Lady Wisdom DON'T get along....

4) The Controller

Now this one doesn't come out very often.. only when I'm around clearly disorganized folx.. then she pops out...sets up everything...executes the plan and returns to hiding...she actully scares me sometimes because I have never been the leader type.


And I KNOW I have a few more alter egos hiding in me... as I told Josh.. an alter ego is simply part of you that doesn't get out much.


Anyway.. one of them.. not sure who...is having quite the agruement with Lady Wisdom about my money matters.


It all started acouple of days ago when as I was walking I realized that my foot was tipping over more than usual (I have extremely flat feet, and the fact that I am overweight and insist on wearing heels tends not to help very much)

So once I got to work, I looked at the bottom of my shoes and realized that I had broken the rubber...so that right where my foot leans the most the shoes was the weakest. *AHA* the source of my recent back and leg pains have been revealed..so I went out to buy a pair pf sneakers...I figured that if I'm going to be doing alot of walking.. I might as well get a pair of proper walking shoes. K-Swiss 60.00 *shudders* which after I got the arch supports and an extra pair of shoelaces totally ate through my megear savings.

Apperently I was doing myself more damage than I knew by walking around in those broken old shoes because my legs were in actual pain after I walked around all day Monday wearing the sneakers. *sighs* I think that my legs & feet have gotten so used to the fact of leaning whatever which way they wanted to.. that imposing the proper way to orient themselves on them caused pain.


Thus we come to the source of the arguement. I suspect that it is an close relative of Rich Woman who is starting the arguement...


What they arguement is basically about is whether I should take a whole crapload of money (most likely an entire paycheck) and invest it in a membership to some kind of health club. *sighs* I am so weak.. and I hate feeling that way.. I have been used to my body doing what I tell it to do without oo many complaints.. but lately.. it seems like it takes less and less to wear me out...and I feel like I'm losing the little bit of hold I had over myself.

However.. Lady wisdom insists that there is really no need to spend the money on a gym.. when we have a perfectly nice VCR..and any sports store sells absolutely wonderful weights and videos and such like for me to work out on. She says that if we had a little more backbone.. we wouldn't need the influence of a class or of the fact that the money has been spent to encourage me to work out.


Personally.. I am leaning towards the side of Rich Woman...I need to exercise.. god knows that...I KNOW myself well enough to know that without outside encouragement it won't last long...and I think that I would enjoy it alot.


But I will let them tussle it over for a while...while I worry about other things