Cheese on Aisle Three!!

(warning - all of the below is written while the author is still in the previously mentioned fog, and should be taken with a grain or two of salt.)

8 dollars a week isn't that much right?? Esp for the change to win hundreds of thousands?? Besides, I'm helping out the kiddies in the Tenn. Educational System. *nods head*

So - I'm here. Well, obviously I'm HERE, but I mean I'm in that mind space where I'm doing the 'mime-in-an-increasingly-smaller-box' thing. It's not that I HATE my job - no, no, no. I wish I could muster up the emotional intensity to hate it - it's just - boring. There ya go. That's the problem in a nutshell. I would be happier if I didn't HAVE time to write in OD, check my personal email(s), chat with my friends, play with my new phone - all that kinda stuff.

If I was swamped to a level that kept me challenged - I would be - happier, at least. Hm. Maybe not HAPPIER - but more invested. More involved. At this point, my focus has seriously shifted again, and I'm remembering why I got/took this job. Not to like it, no, no, no. I got this job for two reasons. 1) It pays 14K more than my last job did, and 2) they paid for us to move south.

So. *sigh* So. My plan is to work here for a year, maybe two - just long enough to pay off all of my bills - and then be done with it. I've been seriously thinking about what else I can do to make money. Obviously doula/midwife is very high on my list (number one, let's be honest) but I'm also thinking about interim things I can do - things I can start doing now, in order to bring in extra money to save/pay bills off faster. I'm still working on my novel - I'd fallen out of the just WRITE - you can fix it later midset, and I have to get back into that. I need - I want - a desk at home. I realized that how the computer is set up is VERY conducive to surfing, not so conducive to real work.

Um. I'm thinking I'm feeling a little rutty. Despite the fact that I'm doing new things, making new friends, going new places, having new experiences - I think.....I think I feel like all of that is external. I don't feel like my insides are growing/changing much. Yeah, I'm feeling pretty stagnant.  I was driving home from a telethon I was roped into volunteering for (but it was REALLLLY fun!!) and drove past a psychic that offered 'Chakra Rebalancing', and I was all like - hmmmm. I wonder what that would feel like.

I need a V8.