Let's see - where to start?? Went swimming last night, the back of my arms are reminding me rather forecefully of that fact. The folx at the Y - including the delightful CaraMuscle - remembered me (heh) and asked if I was realyl going to start coming back. Bleh. It wasn't until later that the 'ugly' thoughts - "Did they say that because it's obvious how FAT I am - and how much bigger I am from before??" started popping in, but no, I think they were really just interested. Saw my associate swim teacher, and she noted that she hasn't seen ANY of my classmates since the class ended. The pool was EMPTY when I got there, and by the time I left (about 1/2 hour later) there were two other fellows - doing much better laps than me, by the by.
Ya know, one thing I'm REALLY going to have to work on in ALL aspects of my life - is the expection of perfection on the first try. Also - how do I know how far to push myself? In other words what is the difference between working to exhaustion, and giving up because I'm too lazy to actually push myself that far? And then of course - it's like - well maybe I AM working to exhaustion, and if I go any further, I'll start to run the risk of the first time excerciser of OVER-working and hurting myself and screwing up the whole plan. For example - last night, those last 2 laps were fucking AGONY. I mean - seriously - my damn arms just didn't WANT to work. I THINK that was exhaustion, as serisouly - if I was in the middle of the ocean, and that shit happened, I woulda drowned. However, was it right to say 'Okay, that's the end of my time' and climb out of the pool, or should I have given myself some rest time, and gone back in and done another 9? I chose to climb out last night, and with the slight strain in my arms, I think I made the right choice - I've clearly WORKED my muscles as they are 'tender' but I haven't worked them so hard that I'm thinking lifting weights tonight is TOTALLY out of the question - so, that's good, yes? That's the general state that I should be in, yes?? I was in the pool for about 20 minutes - working and with the high breathing and heart rate the whole time. I know the goal should be 30 minutes - but that's the GOAL, not where I should be starting at.... *sigh* ANY movement/increased rate is better than the none I've started out with, yes?? Yes, dammit. So - I figure that my first goal should be to do 9 laps straight through (alternating backstroke and crawl), without stopping in the middle of the damn lap. Then, move up to 18, and be able to do all 18 the same way. Then 27, then 36 - a full mile. Holy shit.
Figuring out what my starting weight for the weightlifting is going to be - interesting - I need to look up online and see if there are any guidelines for someone who isn't WEAK, but who is also starting out for the first time in a WHILE. The guidelines that I have of when to increase the weights says that once I can do two more reps after finishing the 'set' number of sets & reps, I need to up the weight. So, maybe I'll just start low - I need to refresh my memory, but I believe the goal is to be close to exhaustion, if not AT exhaustion the last rep of each set.
Speaking of starting weights - FIFTY ONE INCH HIPS???? Holy fuck! At least my hips are bigger than my waist though - and ya notice, I want to lose roughly the same amount (15 from the waist, 12 from the hips) which would keep me in proportion - just a bit tighter. But - oh. my. god. I mean - that's actually MORE shocking than my weight. That number doesn't bother me so much - but 51 inches???? oh, fuck nawh. That's just a tiny bit more than a foot less than my damn HEIGHT is. Oh, HELLLL nawh.
One good thing (I suppose you could say) is that my set weight didn't spring up when I gained the weight back - I started at 230 the last time (or 236....) and I've gone right back up to that, and stopped there. Did I ever talk about the Underburner book that I got? It's an interesting book, but I'll need to re-read it to see if it's really applicable. It was a thin lil book, but I suppose it was worthwhile. But it's - odd to me, that without doing ANYTHING - that's my 'set weight' Yes, it's 90 pounds OVER what I should weigh, but - it's a set weight. The question is - why the hell is my SET weight so bloody high??
Ah yes - another thing that is fueling my current body-consious goal - I'm very much at risk for Type 2 diabetes, and really, nah dude - not trying to support the pharmacuetical industry like that just because I won't take care of myself. Shit, nawh.
Let's see - what else? Lunch today - a chicken thigh, two cherry tomatoes, an avacado, some salad dressing, and some salt. No brekkie (naughty!) and dinner - eh, most likely more chicken. Or maybe some soup.
No clue. I'll figure something out.
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