Art

I'm debating getting a tattoo.

That's not really true - I KNOW that I am getting a tattoo - it's going to be my reward when I have dropped 100 pounds. I figured that out almost simultaneously with figuring out that in order to fall in the 'height/weight' guidelines that's about how much I would have to lose. What I'm really debating right now is whether I'm going to give myself a smaller one to celebrate 50 pounds lost.

I want some sort of badge of honor that marks that event. I've lost 30 pounds so far - but I can't really tell. If it wasn't for my clothes (and the scale) I wouldn't believe that I had lost a pound. When I look in the mirror, I still look as big as I thought I looked when I started. Which means one of two things - either I was deluding myself when I started about how big I was, or my self-image is so twisted that I can't SEE that I'm smaller. Actually - it could mean both. *sigh* So. I think that at 50 pounds (besides it being such a lovely round number) I should be able to tell SOME kind of difference. I mean - I'll be within TEN pounds of the smallest weight I ever recorded for myself - and I recorded that weight when I was 14 & 5'1. And that should show SOMEHOW, right?

The issue is, I'm debating what to get. I know what my 100lb one will be - a tat that spans my lower back of a butterfly, with the Litany Against Fear drawn inside of it - if I can ever figure out how it will look. The midpoint one - I want it to be something kinda small - no more than 2 1/2 inches square. I want it to represent growth, change, and dedication all at once. I like words in tattoos that are represented in a funky artdeco'ish fashion. Hm. And then, of course there is the thought of where to put it. I would love to put it on my back shoulder, but I don't feel like dealing with my mother and her freakout about it showing when I'm wearing my dress. At this point, it will most likely end up on my hip.

So - I've been messing about trying to design something that GRABS me right away. I truly wish that I could draw - I have so many images in my head that I can't accurately translate and it's right frustrating trying to find someone else's vision of my vision. I like tribal style tattoos - heavy black lines with swoops and arcs in them. I also like Kanji - but I don't want symbols that I can't immediately understand on me. I wear a necklace now that has a meaning I can't remember - and if it wasn't for the fact that I KNOW I wouldn't have purchased it if it menat something bad, I would have stopped wearing it a long time ago. But - I don't want to repeat that particular brain fart, so no arabic or japanese tattooed on me. I was thinking of using elemental symbols, but the western style I don't like, and Wicca doesn't have a standardized set of symbols, so once again I would have to create my own.

This is going to torment me until I figure out what I want....and IE is acting odd and freezing up as I look for images. Horrid Windows...trying to force me to work.