Monday, February 3, 2003

Balance

I find a certain level of security in being odd. It feels better to believe that the reason I am so solitary is simply because there are so few others out there who can connect to me, rather than it simply being a matter of me MISSING something.
At the same time, I worry that I'm not really odd - I just use it (as I've used money and weight and religion) as an excuse to keep me safe in my solitary little coocon.

But in everything there must be a level of balance. With the purchase of this diary - I now have three. Two on this website, and one that is set up solely for me on my website. I consiously chose to convert my other diary into a place where the entry are all narrowly focused on a certain topic - but I began to miss the connections that I formed with others as I spoke/wrote about my ENTIRE life. So - here I am again...making a place where I can write about everything that I would rather TALK about - but have so few to talk to. So - one place where I vent and talk about a major event in my life. One place where I whisper the thoughts that sometimes I'm almost ashamed to admit I have, and one place to simply write and vibrate with others.

Balance.

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